What are the responsibilities of a power of attorney for an elderly parent?

I understand that being a good power of attorney is important to you. What specific responsibilities or situations are you concerned about in your role as a POA?

Are you currently serving as a power of attorney for someone, or are you considering taking on this role in the future?

Is there anything else the Lawyer should know before I connect you? Rest assured they’ll be able to help with your mother’s care.

Hello and welcome to our service. My name is Queeneth. I am an attorney with over 8 years of legal experience. I will do my best to assist you today. First, I need to ask you a few questions to give you the best answer. (Kindly note that our conversation does not establish an attorney-client relationship.)

Could you tell me if your mother’s Power of Attorney document includes any specific instructions or limitations regarding her care, finances, or housing?

Thank you for the feedback. Please allow me some time to prepare a response. I will get back to you shortly.

Being a good POA means acting like a fiduciary: you use your mother’s authority and money only for her benefit, keep good records, avoid conflicts, and do only what the POA document actually allows. Most states set out these core agent duties in their version of the Uniform Power of Attorney Act (Section 114, Agent’s Duties). The CFPB’s guide for agents under a power of attorney explains that an agent is a fiduciary managing money/property for someone else, and state laws vary.

First, separate “financial POA” from “medical authority.” If your mother’s POA only covers finances, it may let you pay bills, deal with banks, insurance, housing payments, benefits, and contracts. It may not give you authority to make medical decisions, manage medications, choose doctors, or decide care placement unless the document says that or she also has a health care power of attorney/advance directive. AARP notes that caregivers usually need permission to act both financially and medically, and those are often separate documents.

So your first task is to find and read: the POA document; any health care POA / advance directive / living will; HIPAA release; will; trust, if any; insurance policies; bank, pension, Social Security, Medicare/Medicaid, VA, or retirement documents.

The big rules for you as POA. Do these consistently:

Use her money for her needs only: housing, food, medications, insurance, care, utilities, transportation, debt, taxes, and safety.

Do not mix her money with yours. Keep her accounts separate. Do not pay your personal bills from her account unless there is a clear, documented reimbursement she owes you.

Keep receipts and a ledger. Track every dollar in and out. AARP specifically recommends documenting spending and saving receipts because it protects both the older adult and the caregiver from accusations of financial abuse.

Do not make gifts, transfer property, add yourself to accounts, or sell major assets unless the POA clearly allows it and it is legally safe. Under Section 201 of the Uniform Power of Attorney Act, powers like making gifts generally require express authority in the document. This is especially important if Medicaid/long-term care may be needed, because transfers for less than fair market value during the five-year look-back period can trigger a penalty under 42 U.S.C. § 1396p(c).

Make decisions based on her wishes, not yours. If she can still express preferences, involve her.

Get medical and housing decisions in writing. Doctor notes, medication lists, care recommendations, lease/assisted living agreements, home-care contracts, and discharge plans should all be saved.

Because costs are rising, your next steps should be practical.

Make a one-page “mother care file” with:

Monthly income: Social Security, pension, retirement, disability, rental income.
Monthly expenses: rent/mortgage, utilities, food, insurance, medications, caregivers, transportation, debt.
Assets: bank accounts, home, car, life insurance, retirement accounts.
Care needs: medications, diagnoses, fall risk, memory issues, bathing/dressing/cooking needs, appointments.
Housing options: stay home with help, move in with family, senior apartment, assisted living, nursing care.

Then call your local Area Agency on Aging / Eldercare Locator. The federal Eldercare Locator connects older adults and caregivers with local support resources, and it lists 1-800-677-1116 as a contact number. They can point you to meals, transportation, caregiver help, benefits screening, respite care, and local senior housing resources.

About Medicaid / long-term care: Do not start moving assets around to “protect” money or qualify for benefits without an elder-law attorney. Medicaid long-term care rules are state-specific and complicated. Medicaid.gov confirms Medicaid funds long-term services and supports, but eligibility and coverage rules depend heavily on the state. A good POA does not just “save money.” A good POA preserves eligibility, avoids penalties, documents spending, and pays for necessary care.

About the missing will: The will usually does not control your mother’s care while she is alive. It controls what happens after death. Also, your POA authority usually ends at death.

To look for the will: check her files, safe, lockbox, desk, and old mail; ask her bank if she has a safe deposit box; ask prior attorneys; search email/cloud storage if you have lawful access; ask trusted relatives whether she ever mentioned a lawyer; check for trust documents, because sometimes people say “will” when they really mean “trust.”

What I would do first this week: Read the POA and see whether it is durable, whether it covers only finances, and whether it gives authority for housing/care contracts. Then gather her monthly income/expenses and medication/care list. After that, contact the Area Agency on Aging and schedule a consult with an elder-law attorney, even if only for one hour, before making any major housing, asset, or Medicaid decisions.